I sit staring at my hands for the twentieth time while I try to summarize my experience on the Pacific Crest Trail. Each time I start reflecting and writing, my mind wanders off and gets lost in the other world that was my thru hike. Half of me doesn’t believe I ever really hiked the Pacific Crest Trail and the other half thinks I’ll wake up tomorrow and be back on the trail, chasing that mythical monument at the border.

I want to summarize the elation and sadness of finishing the thing I poured all of my self into for four and a half months, but I can’t.

I want to summarize the beauty in the world I saw, but I can’t.

I want to summarize the pain and loneliness I felt at times, but I can’t.

I want to summarize the compassion of strangers like I’d never experienced before, but I can’t.

I want to summarize the deprivation of so much I’d grown accustom to, but I can’t.

I want to summarize the friends I made along the way, but I can’t.

I want to summarize, but I can’t.